I understand men see things from a different point of view, and do not see the history full of struggle. But to just blatantly refuse to see the offense in the jokes of many other tv shows and movies, and of late Seth MacFarlane, or even refuse to admit that when women are getting offended it might be legitimate.
Why must a women that is upset at being publicly degraded for over 3hrs be considered over sensitive or a "Femi-Nazi". Why can't it just be that seeing only our bodies and nothing more is offensive and/or hurts?
Is it too hard to want to be able to get a job without the manager considering if I'm hot enough or beautiful enough? But of course I can't be too "slutty". We walk such a fine line, but can never win.
We are sought after for our looks but not our brains, but when it comes down to it we must also exceed the intelligence of a man in the same field. We must be attractive, sexual but not overly, and smart. But of course only consider our body or only consider it first. If we never stand up for it then nothing will ever change.
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
Monday, February 25, 2013
Sorry I haven't written in a while, my schedule has been hectic. I was hoping to keep up weekly but it seems I fell down on the job. Hopefully I can start being better from now on.
So much has happened that I want to talk about but I guess I will start with being accepted.
I'm not talking about being accepted by ones peers in school, though I suppose that's something that this will mention or relates to, but how one is accepted by your friends and family when they find how much you are interested in a social cause, sexual lifestyle, or life decision.
I can't speak for anyone other than myself, but I am a feminist, always have been. But after a recent experience I became much more vocal and outwardly obvious of my view. Though I do not, and never have, subscribed to very extreme feminist ideals; I find it important to read those views to greater understand and find stronger positions in my own views. To me reading the work of women such as Betty Friedan, Andrea Dworkin, and Annie Roiphe is important to see where and why the feminist movement started and how and why it has changed throughout the years.
While taking Gender & Horror Film at University, I decided to return to reading the many great feminist writers. Taking out of the library, Debating Sexual Correctness: Pornography, Sexual Harassment, Date Rape, and the Politics of Sexual Equality by Adele M. Stan. It was while reading just the introduction I found parts that I agreed with, could relate to, found shocking, or even agreed with other writers mentioned that perhaps a particular feminist view could be too extreme. It was through my many chuckles or sarcastic scoffs that M would ask, and I would explain my sound or even without him asking share what I was reading. Hoping that he would see why I read about sexual harassment, politics, women's rights and equality, and rape. Especially rape...
M is not the only one wondering. My friends have wondered why I became so much more extreme. I think to myself, I was always thinking along these lines, but now I'm just ingesting more to further my knowledge. Is that so wrong? If so, when did learning become wrong. And because I speak up about equality more, I've become extreme, if fighting for equality makes me extreme then so be it. But why are other women so laissez faire about being considered equal?
But back to before... M finally got frustrated so to speak "Why do you constantly read about rape? Why are you so interested in rape?" He doesn't like when it's brought up, it makes him uncomfortable...and angry. I understand that, it's not a comfortable topic, but he's lucky, he's able to put that subject out of his mind. He's free to walk down the street and not have his first concern be whether the man walking towards him is going to follow him home or force him into an alley way and violate him. Men fear being mugged and killed, but very few truly fear rape. He doesn't have to hold the feelings and ideas of sexual assault in his head for any longer than it's put in there by someone or something else.
Reading about any feminist theory, sex and sexuality is going to come up somewhere. It's unavoidable. He feels that my reading about rape is weird or perhaps unhealthy. But sex, rape, and feminism is all tied together. He asks if all I read is feminist based topics, and lately it's been what I've been reading, but it's not all I read. It's what I'm in the mood for.
"So what if lately it's what I want to read, does that effect you?" I think to myself.
But I suppose it does effect him. M is a part of my life and my views of the world do have some impact on him. But it was not until M said late last night "What's the point? It's not like anything will change." I was awestruck...how can you want a daughter and not even think that maybe hoping she doesn't have to go through the same things I have, so that maybe men will understand that clucking or slapping a woman's ass on the street isn't okay.
I see his point that as long as there is violence and no peace in the world things will never change a lot. Or that as long as violence is something money can be made from that it will always be around. But what about simple equality? The right to equal pay, and not to be hired or not hired based on my attractiveness level.
I think the point of having your family and friends understand, isn't to make it so they completely understand why or even fully support it. But just so they understand that this is you, and whether they understand why or don't like it, you will not change.
Any thoughts?
So much has happened that I want to talk about but I guess I will start with being accepted.
I'm not talking about being accepted by ones peers in school, though I suppose that's something that this will mention or relates to, but how one is accepted by your friends and family when they find how much you are interested in a social cause, sexual lifestyle, or life decision.
I can't speak for anyone other than myself, but I am a feminist, always have been. But after a recent experience I became much more vocal and outwardly obvious of my view. Though I do not, and never have, subscribed to very extreme feminist ideals; I find it important to read those views to greater understand and find stronger positions in my own views. To me reading the work of women such as Betty Friedan, Andrea Dworkin, and Annie Roiphe is important to see where and why the feminist movement started and how and why it has changed throughout the years.
While taking Gender & Horror Film at University, I decided to return to reading the many great feminist writers. Taking out of the library, Debating Sexual Correctness: Pornography, Sexual Harassment, Date Rape, and the Politics of Sexual Equality by Adele M. Stan. It was while reading just the introduction I found parts that I agreed with, could relate to, found shocking, or even agreed with other writers mentioned that perhaps a particular feminist view could be too extreme. It was through my many chuckles or sarcastic scoffs that M would ask, and I would explain my sound or even without him asking share what I was reading. Hoping that he would see why I read about sexual harassment, politics, women's rights and equality, and rape. Especially rape...
M is not the only one wondering. My friends have wondered why I became so much more extreme. I think to myself, I was always thinking along these lines, but now I'm just ingesting more to further my knowledge. Is that so wrong? If so, when did learning become wrong. And because I speak up about equality more, I've become extreme, if fighting for equality makes me extreme then so be it. But why are other women so laissez faire about being considered equal?
But back to before... M finally got frustrated so to speak "Why do you constantly read about rape? Why are you so interested in rape?" He doesn't like when it's brought up, it makes him uncomfortable...and angry. I understand that, it's not a comfortable topic, but he's lucky, he's able to put that subject out of his mind. He's free to walk down the street and not have his first concern be whether the man walking towards him is going to follow him home or force him into an alley way and violate him. Men fear being mugged and killed, but very few truly fear rape. He doesn't have to hold the feelings and ideas of sexual assault in his head for any longer than it's put in there by someone or something else.
Reading about any feminist theory, sex and sexuality is going to come up somewhere. It's unavoidable. He feels that my reading about rape is weird or perhaps unhealthy. But sex, rape, and feminism is all tied together. He asks if all I read is feminist based topics, and lately it's been what I've been reading, but it's not all I read. It's what I'm in the mood for.
"So what if lately it's what I want to read, does that effect you?" I think to myself.
But I suppose it does effect him. M is a part of my life and my views of the world do have some impact on him. But it was not until M said late last night "What's the point? It's not like anything will change." I was awestruck...how can you want a daughter and not even think that maybe hoping she doesn't have to go through the same things I have, so that maybe men will understand that clucking or slapping a woman's ass on the street isn't okay.
I see his point that as long as there is violence and no peace in the world things will never change a lot. Or that as long as violence is something money can be made from that it will always be around. But what about simple equality? The right to equal pay, and not to be hired or not hired based on my attractiveness level.
I think the point of having your family and friends understand, isn't to make it so they completely understand why or even fully support it. But just so they understand that this is you, and whether they understand why or don't like it, you will not change.
Any thoughts?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)